Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, removed his siblings, which gave him all the milk.

After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen. It's cage needed steel bars that were 5" thick and nobody could get near it.

When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal. It was a 9 foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for Bush because they knew there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Afghanistani dog.

When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's cage and slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog. Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of it's cage and charged the American Dachshund----but when it got close enough to bite the Dachshund's neck, the Dachshund opened it's mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite. There was nothing left at all of his dog. Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief. "We don't understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves."

"That's nothing," said Bush. "We had our best plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like that dog."